Retro review: Pirates! (1987)

Retro review: Pirates! (1987)

This game stands high atop the mountain that is my list of favorites. I have played this game for countless hours on PC and NES, across the various versions, releases and iterations of the game.

My first experience with the game was at my friends house (where I played Kings Quest III among other games). We would take turns steering the ship, fencing and plundering our way through the Caribbean.

While we seldom made it very far into this epic pirate simulation, later in life I, shall we say, beat the crap out of it.
First thing’s first, early game play is quite memorable, after a brief story starter based on the time period and nationality you chose, you set off for adventure.

I spent some time playing this again, the early DOS version over on archive.org – and I must say the early moments of fighting can be a bit tense. The goal would be to amass bigger ships and enough crew to overpower your enemies but when you first start out you’re at a definite disadvantage. Further complicating matters, depending on the time period and nationality you chose there may be more enemies around than allies.

The game offers more than just swordplay and cannons (though those are definitely fun). You can find treasure maps, hunt notorious pirates for bounty, seek out long lost family, acquire land, rank and title. Even attract the eye of some lucky Governor’s daughter (The Governor being lucky to have such a noble captain court his daughter… ehhem).

Each time you play, you do so against the clock. Every defeat wastes precious months and eventually defeat leads to retirement.

I enjoy imagining that sailing is peaceful and the crew works together and sings pirate-y songs. Yo ho… of course I’m fairly certain that likely never happened in reality. But hey, a guy can dream eh?

The other versions are updated in graphics only for the most part, though I believe the later games remove the ‘ground combat’ mechanic that happens when you attack a village after having landed and left your ships. Though I’d have to go back and play each version to be certain of that.

If you enjoy simulations or pirates this is likely already in your bucket-o-played-games. If not, pick up one of the many copies available out there and swashbuckle your way to chief pirate and doubloon counter on the Spanish Main.

In the words of my favorite television portrayal of a radio mental health professional: I bid you good day, and good mental health!
-NG

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